Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Signs of Our Times

Do you watch Mad Men? Sure you don't. It's a well-written drama with complex characters and intriguing plots based in an environment where illusion meets disappointment. It's a great little show, really.

Anyway, while surfing around, I came across these comments on the second season finale. They concern not only the characters on the program but the posters themselves:

Babies are tragedies when they're unwanted. They aren't blessings, they're
burdens. A baby is actually kind of icky, without the love to make it a
"miracle." They drool constantly, they wallow in their own waste, you have to
change their diapers and they wet the bed...people would not keep a pet that
required as much care or that was as gross as a human infant. And when every
time you look at your child you're looking at the reason you're not a model
doing the NY-London-Paris circuit, you're going to hate that child. Especially
if that child is also the reason you're stuck in a marriage with a guy you
pretty much think is a pig.

But if God is so all-powerful, why doesn't he just fix the damn
road?


Because he enjoys watching people slide into the ditch? Because it's boring
out there in immortal omniscience land, and watching people slide into the ditch
is about the only fun he has? Dunno.


Though probably not as upsetting as being dead. Or having no choice
over your own future. Abortion comes with terrible side effects for most women,
regardless how they feel about it at the time. Depression, anxiety, PTSD, even
guilt, to name a few (I've been and have worked with abortion survivors for
years). Betty didn't go through with it - only thought about it - which strikes
me as completely normal for her situation. She'll be better off in the long run,
and the child will certainly be better off, even if the family completely
disintegrates. At least s/he will have an opportunity to make his/her own
choices, and Betty (considering her character) will be spared decades of
suffering.

That second comment strikes me as a very large generalization about both
the outcomes of abortion and Betty. I've had an abortion before and I've known
other women who had an abortion before and most of us haven't suffered greatly
for it. I think that how women deal with the aftermath of having an abortion
really hinges on how they view abortion beforehand. If they view it as a woman's
choice, they're likely to make peace with themselves afterward. But if they're
in an environment where they're considered evil/terrible/selfish for not having
a child, of course they'll suffer more. (And on that note, I have to admit I
admire Betty for being in that second environment and still deciding that she's
going to press for an abortion, and even try and induce one by herself if
necessary. There's a lot of talk about her being a passive person on other
boards but she really has a set of clangers that could ring like steel.)

In any case, I hardly ever think about my abortion now unless it comes up
and when it does, I'm glad I had the choice to get a safe, legal, easily
available abortion that Betty and a lot of other women (Peggy, anyone?) didn't
have. My life would have been a lot harder right now if I had had a child as a
teenager, just as Betty's life will likely be a lot more anxious now that she's
having a child with a husband who's proven that he's more than capable of
abandoning her and her children without any warning. Children, especially
infants, are a real strain on a marriage.


These comments- at least to me- serve as a stark reminder of the selfishness, impracticality, materialism, hopelessness and complete lack of feeling for God or man that runs in the fabric of the Western world. Those who have the guts to counter the posters who air their dirty laundry on a public board get drowned out by the transparent need for someone to accept an act the roots of which are trapped in selfishness. Why any of this was brought up, I don't know. I thought people were just talking about a TV show, not their personal lives and why they are train wrecks.

Just my thoughts.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Abortion causes side effects for women? The evidence is overwhelming that religion is one of if not the most common contributor to emotional difficuly in adult life. Catholicism has a corner on the guilt market. i.e. if you don't buy a mass for your dead loved one they will spend eternity in purgatory. Or, if you don't go to confession, you go to hell. I could go on but you get the point. The only common side effect of abortion is an end to pregnancy. While I don't necessarily support abortion, I also don't support the self appointed "moral barometer" telling someone how to live their life. I'm CERTAIN that you wouldn't want someone telling you how to live yours. Even though it really seems you don't have one.

RU-40 HPV

Osumashi Kinyobe said...

Is your moniker supposed to be pithy or demonstrative?
If you feel guilt, you've done something wrong. If you feel shame, you have a neurosis.
I am sure you have a vast knowledge of all things Catholic, or perhaps you just equate a rather large issue with one group. Whatever the case may be, I stand by my post believing that the culture of death is destructive in all respects.

Anonymous said...

Did you read my post? I never said I feel guilt. You are reading things that simply aren't there. I merely said the church has a corner on guilt. I don't feel shame, but thank you for pointing out this perceived neurosis. It speaks volumes as to your own frame of mind.


. . . and pithy? Why, yes, just a little.

Osumashi Kinyobe said...

Touche, faux-pithy, however, I don't think you are even close to understanding my mind, nor are you spot-on about who owns guilt. The "you" in my remarks was hypothetical (you know- metaphysics, imagining scenarios and such).
Check out the Catechism yourself. Actually talk to people whom you think feel this guilt you are referring to.

TomVM said...

Really don't understand the anonymous comment. In the inner-city youth home where I work, we teach the kids that guilt is a great emotion. It's a sign of a healthy emotional self, that they are actually coming to terms with their actions and feelings. I'm Anglican and I feel guilt. A Jewish mother's guilt is a common notion. Guilt is universal. Why are people bringing in particular faiths? Is it the same reason why they brought up race with Obama? In addition, these are fairy tale notions of the Catholicism. Another thing, and we are not supposed to address this at the home, but I've seen young girls affected by abortion. The reseach is overwhelming. No one is telling anyone how to run their lives. Actually, that's not true for my profession - when a kid tells me that he wants to kill himself I say no he can't. I tell them that is a wrong choice and I tell him why. Really the same can be said for abortion.

TravisB said...

Actually the evidence is overwhelming that having faith(whichever you choose) enhances your life and is healthy for mind and body. Take this doctor's reseach:
http://www.beliefnet.com/Health/2006/05/What-Religion-Can-Do-For-Your-Health.aspx

I remember in high school teachers showing us the effects of alcohol, drugs and smoking. They still do this and I'm glad they do because I don't want my little boys to have their lives damaged. Are these teachers telling us how to run our lives or are they providing us with all the facts and information before we make a choice?

Anonymous, you don't necessary support abortion . What don't you support about it? Curious to know.

Osumashi Kinyobe said...

I was talking about how the culture of death manifests itself and now we are talking abut guilt!
Yes, TomVM and Tina, precisely. People who don't feel guilt are people we should be worried about. People are told not to smoke or drink or do drugs all the time. Is it not reasonable to each out and warn people about other dangers?