2012 is nearly over. Let’s hope the new year is better to you.
January: Kim Jong-Un assumed control of North Korea after his fat dictator father died before Christmas. The cruise ship Costa Concordia sank . Obama is a moron. A guilty verdict is handed down in the Shafia trial.
February: the McGuinty government became the bullies in the fight against bullying. Discuss. Plans for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee begin. Prime Minister Stephen Harper started selling off bits of Canada to China. Sponges at the decrepit Attawapiskat Reservation receive the first in a series of modular homes that they will reduce to nothing. It is predicted that this will not end. A court orders Quebec students to take compulsory religious equivalence classes. Former presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich reminded the American electorate that Obama once voted for infanticide. Iran sentenced a Christian convert to three years in prison. Don’t forget the leap year.
March: Andrew Breitbart passed away. Obama, the moron, apologised to Afghan terrorists for Korans that would be burned by these guys anyway and North Korea plays one of its favourite games, “Give Me Food and I’ll Pretend to Want Peace”. Some chick was offended or something. Robo-calls. One of the first atrocities in Benghazi, Libya. Obama (RE: moron) had to be taken to task by Benjamin Netanyahu. Obama, along with his unreasonable and inflexible Obamacare, placed the Vatican on a list of money-laundering countries. Celebrity Apartheid Week- it happened. Time to quit Islam. South Korea’s indignation trumps China’s wretched human rights abuses anyday. The War on Saint Patrick’s Day. Muslim murder in France kills seven people. The Ontario Court of Appeal allows prostitution. Obama makes promises to Russia on a hot mike. The “Thrilla on the Hilla”- it happened.
April: have you pressed a button today? A man protected himself with spices and paid the price; a brutal beating of a bus driver exposes (yet again) the multi-tiered legal system of Canada; Cubans take the opportunity to attend Good Friday Mass. The ninety-fifth anniversary of Vimy Ridge. Rick Santorum leaves the presidential race and Bashar Assad is a monster. It’s the stupid Charter. Levon Helm passed away. Sudanese dictator Omar al-Bashir threatened to overthrow South Sudan’s government. Alberta’s Wildrose Party did not sweep the elections. Jean Charest is a cheese-eating surrender monkey.
May: Obama, the moron, politicises the death of Osama bin Laden because he’s Obama. He didn’t even kill the guy, for God’s sake. Someone else did. He’s lazy. The Chinese firm, Hua Wei, casts suspicion upon itself. Canada is accused of being less-than-obese by some Euro-lackey. Talks resumed between students and the Quebec government for some reason. Jim Unger passed away. Luka Magnotta is caught. 999, 1000….
June: the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee. Eduard Khil passed away. Obama saved Eric Holder. The two hundredth anniversary of the War of 1812.
July: Obama began his love affair with Egyptian president Morsi. Tony Clement allowed an honour for Chinese communist sympathiser, Norman Bethune. The Summer Olympics opened in London.
August: The Federal Court ruled that the Canadian government didn’t’t have the right to track the money wasted at Attawapiskat. Paul Ryan was chosen as Mitt Romney’s running mate. Free Cupcake. Neil Armstrong passed away.
September: The Parti Quebecois won a minority government, a man is murdered during Pauline Marois’ victory speech and Obama is a moron. Four Americans are killed in Benghazi. The cover-up begins.
October: In the first presidential debate, Mitt Romney kicked Obama’s @$$. Glorious day of days, McGuinty resigned!
December: the slow crawl toward Christmas, the holiday that obviously celebrates the birth of Christ. Four Americans die and no one really is to blame. Justin Trudeau is also a moron, Americans are screwed and Chief Theresa Spense is a greedy fatso. South Korea elected its first female president. God bless us, everyone.
Let’s move on….